Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Looking For A Life Partner?

Singlehood is a very special stage of one's life a time for self discovery but there'll come a time when you'll yearn to have someone to call "your own".  The apartment you spent so much time decorating and furnishing, wardropes you spent money on and hobbies may no longer be of use and interest to you . You'd want to have someone to come home to.  To laugh at your jokes funny or not. Someone to spend time with, if not for life for a long, long while. Completeness. Fulfilment. 

Contrary to what people say and believe, making the right choice doesn't start with you. You have to go down on your knees first, ask God to help you. Everything is in God's hand, past, present and the future. Humans have unpredictable natures so they are wont to change. Most times we make decisions we feel is right but may bring about our downfall. A failed relationship/marriage creates a big dent in one's life.

Choosing the right person lies with you. Are you ready to settle down? Can you support someone? What do you want from life? What are your goals and aspirations for life? Do you want someone to share your dreams with you? You have to choose a person who'll help you fulfil your purpose in life. That is what marriage is about. You mustn't get married because it'll be safe to do so (to avoid AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease).  It should be because you have an ache, a hole that needs to be filled in yourheart, a hunger for completeness and a yearning for fulfillment.

You have to be ready to forgo pleasures which won't last, shine your eyes like we say in my country. Don't let physical attributes blind you from seeing the person(s) real natures. So many marriages fail because they try to find satisfaction in things that don't matter. As much as sex is an integral part of every relationship, it doesn't have the glue to hold two hearts or minds together.

Most times I ask married men questions they won't give answers to. What about the woman at home? What's wrong with her? Surely if your relationships are successful would you want someone else in your lives? One actually told me, " if you wake up one day and you are served bread and tea for breakfast, lunch and dinner, at a point you'd want a different kind of food". Can you imagine that? If that's the case what's the need for getting married then?

Change is the only thing that doesn't change in life. When you make your choice, there has to be SOMETHING you wouldn't want to change in that special person's life, something you'd never tire of doing with him/her but how would you know something won't happen to CHANGE your lives one day? That's why you have to ask God for help from to help you. He's the only one I know who knows how to make things right. Have you asked him for help today?